If you offer me a penny for my thoughts… I’ll have to give you change back
I support our veterans. They keep our pets healthy.
Bread goes in. Toast comes out. Where does the bread go?
My sister doesn’t know if she’s having a boy or a girl. I don’t know if I’m going to be an aunt or an uncle.
When you get off the plane in Venezuela… and you can’t seem to find the Socialist utopia that you were expecting.
Why are buffalo wings so small… when buffalos are so big?
Have you accepted the state as your Lord and savior?
Never let someone who has done nothing… tell you how to do anything.
How do they get the “Keep off the grass” sign on the grass?
Noting is built in America these days I just bought a T. V. and it said “Built in Antenna.” I don’t even know where that is!
Blonds are now telling Alexandria Ocasión-Cortez jokes